«The Blog of Wistar Watts Murray
If Jesus hung out with me on Christmas, he would get so fat
He’d be like, “We ate an hour ago. It’s time to eat again. Where are the candied nuts?”
I’d be like, “Jesus, your pants are starting to look a little tight around the hips.”
“Shh,” he’d say. “We’ll talk about it after New Year’s. I’m going to buy a gym membership on the 2nd after I’m done purging.”
I’d put my eggnog down and hoist myself up from the couch long enough to see Jesus sneaking more molasses cookies in the kitchen. “But Jesus,” I’d say, “you are going to fall into a sugar coma.”
“We’ll cross that bridge when we come to it,” he’d say. “Give me some more of your honey baked ham.”
starrhillgirl Said:
on December 27, 2007 at 11:42 pm
I *love* you. Even more than I love Jesus.
Wistar Said:
on December 28, 2007 at 10:48 am
Well, as it turns out, there is now more of me to love.
PS I love you too!
kp Said:
on December 28, 2007 at 2:53 pm
i just baked 10 dozen chocolate chip cookies to deal with the surfeit of butter, sugar, eggs, and chips. send yer ass on over.
vanessa Said:
on January 13, 2008 at 7:13 pm
why would you make fun of him like that?
Wistar Said:
on January 16, 2008 at 10:18 pm
Seriously?