Daily Archives: July 12, 2008

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On the allure of bad books

I typically put down a book after a single chapter if the narrator’s voice bothers me. But in the past couple weeks I’ve read two books cover to cover that I disliked from the first page: Jonathan Lethem’s The Fortress of Solitude and Ann Cleeves’s Raven Black. Granted, these books belong in two different categories. The first is a literary exploration of Race, Ghetto Fetishism, Art, Superhero-dom, Etc.; the second is a beach thriller set on Scotland’s Shetland Island. But I hated both of them. And yet I kept turning the pages until the end.

As a fiction writer, it can sometimes be enjoyable (in a schadenfreudy way) to read bad fiction. You don’t have to suffer jealousy of great writing. You can spend the time analyzing what you, as an author, would do differently. And you can gloat about being a better writer, even if it’s not true (Is anyone reading me on the beach? No.). You’re reading a book, but the whole time you’re thinking, “I’m reading a book.” I don’t want to read someone’s book; I want to enter another world where the author is invisible and where I’ll learn something worthwhile. But some authors are too good or too bad to disappear into their writing. Jonatham Lethem is a little too good – he writes well, but his voice doesn’t ring true for me. Ann Cleeves is a little too bad – she’s obviously found a story, but not her sea legs.

It’s not the first time I’ve read a disappointing book cover to cover. Sometimes you sense a story that needs to be exposed beneath the surface of poor writing. Sometimes you sense great writing beneath a story that doesn’t need to be exposed. These readable, unreadable books have to be written. They are training wheels. But they say more about the authors than they do about real life. And I suppose I keep reading sometimes because I commiserate with the green authors instead of with their fictional creations.

It’s a paradoxical demand we place on novelists. They must create something utterly fictional, but utterly real. And what horrible pressure: even the worst writer will know immediately if the writing is flawed. We’ve all read many more books than we have written, a statistic which makes us “experts” on the craft. And yet the best reader can write terrible books again and again. Maybe reading those books is penance for an author’s own bad writing. Maybe there’s a price to pay for putting words into the world. You have to do time for the trade you love. At least let that time be spent on the beach.

Portugal and Portuguy

We’re here in Cascais (“Cash-Cash”), Portugal, about 30 minutes from Lisbon. So far so good. We found a park with wandering peacocks and kennels of white rabbits. The bbf is excited because Culture Club is playing in the Irish bar where we internet. Portuguese beach kids are way cute – confirming that the English parents did, in fact, kidnap Madeleine. The policia just needed an outsider’s perspective to solve that one.

Thong bikinis – still popular.

Smoking – not as popular.

Speedos – only popular if they’re bulging.

Let me stop and clarify for a second that all my friends hate me because I’m here. So I don’t want to show off about the pristine beaches and the bunny rabbits and the citadels and such. Maybe I should just chronicle the bad stuff. Like I’m pretty sure I saw some poodle shit on the cobbled street earlier. Right before I bought ripe cherries from a street vendor and had my picture taken on a castle wall. And I got a grain of sand in my eye while I was tanning. So it’s not all roses here. But they do climb the walls of my apartment.

I’m sure we’ll eventually have a day of bad weather or at least some GI problems. But for now, we like the local beer, we like the green wine, we like the Right Said Fred video playing on the pub TV (local beer helps), we like that no one has tried to sell us heroin yet, and we like watching the teenagers making out in the ocean. It’s like they’ve never kissed anyone before – it’s beautiful.

But we wish we could share our trip with everyone. So if you want to give me your mailing address, I’ll send you a postcard. I won’t even charge you like this guy. And I promise to write you something insensible, maybe in broken Portuguese. Quick, get your postcard while you can. This place will only exist while I’m here. It’s called global solipsism, and it only works for me.