Yesterday I was included in a country club lunch with my Virginia grandparents, their visiting niece (a poet), and her husband (a photographer). When the lively company wasn’t telling sacrilegious jokes, the niece stated her belief that everyone had an internal age, a subconscious clock inside her body that was frozen somewhere in time. She [...]
Category > Uncomfortable thoughts
Ugh
I think my blog’s getting pretentious. Wordy. Anyone want to weigh in on this?
I need to figure out how to upload funny pictures of celebrities that I steal from here.
It has always been our name so deal
They say that the sweetest sound in the English language is one’s own name. I heard a lot of it today. “Wistar, you have no blood vessels in your left leg.” “Wistar, can you eat some fruit cocktail, or do you think you might throw it up?” “Wistar, we’re just going to stick this needle [...]
My Shocking 6 Hours with Topless Britney
I know someone who went to Helsinki and spent $10 on an Us Weekly with this headline. Ten dollars seems extreme, but I can’t really deny that after a few days in Finland I might feel an expensive need to read about Britney Spears. Traveling outside of my comfort zone, where I know exactly who [...]
Personal
We got back from our trip at 4AM. I drove the whole way from Brooklyn, fueled by dessicated chicken fingers, Diet Coke, chocolate chip cookies, and Necco wafers. The train ride from Montreal to Penn Station was beautiful - we saw the ruins of a Spanish castle on a Spanish castle-sized island in the Hudson [...]
Swimming in the City
If I had known in advance that I was going swimming at the city pool this afternoon, I probably would not have had six beers last night and a cheese omelette/home fries/English muffin/french toast/Gobstoppers for breakfast. But if I had known that someone was going to take a crap in the city pool today, I [...]
Sleepy Little Town
This morning Darren drove me down Locust Avenue to retrieve my car, abandoned the night before so we could carpool to Superbad. As I drove home, I realized how sleepy Charlottesville is. Downtown, I was the only person waiting at the stoplight in front of an empty Lucky Seven convenience store. The former gas station/five [...]
Iraq & Peru
This morning I was thinking about the earthquake in Peru and the victims of the latest bombings in Iraq, but how do you commemorate tragedy in a blog? People read blogs like this to escape, to be whisked off into someone else’s solipsistic universe. I actually thought of having “a moment of blog silence,” but [...]
Maybe Your Parents Were Married Once
I am cribbing another link from Gawker. Every once in a while, the folks at Gawker stop being snarky and show some genuine, un-ironic human emotion. Today they led me to this article about couples therapy (and marriage in general), because somehow this unaffected comment on the website slipped through the cracks: “Did you read [...]
Jobs I Would Hate
POLICE SKETCH ARTIST
Can you tell me what the perp looked like?
He was tall, I guess. He smelled like grapefruit. He was wearing shoes. It all happened so fast.
Can you tell me if the perp had blue or brown eyes?
He had hairy arms. Citrussy. Wearing pants, I think.
Did he have any facial hair? A beard or [...]
